In Memory of My Dad
Having the same birthday as my father, it’s obvious we’d be close. Throw in me being an only child. So when he suddenly passed away this week, everything went blank.
Exposing me to Coltrane, Miles, Hendrix and Tony Williams as a kid, then me getting him deep into funk (which I got from Mom) and hip-hop of my teens – Gang Starr, Tim Dog, Professor Griff, Kool G Rap and Capital Tax were his favorites, eclectic taste – music was our bond from early. Basement jams; excursions to record stores and conventions every other weekend growing up, including way out to a diner in New Jersey to find obscure Kool & the Gang albums; escorting me to dangerous studios in high school…he was there every step. During my hiatus from music I started covering high school b-ball – he’d just retired and rolled with me to games, bonding over hoops. Only right since I rarely beat him one on one – OGs will hook shot and finger roll you to death.
In 2011 he put a drum set in the basement on a whim and his only words were “make it happen”. He helped me find passion for music again, and a whole new chapter. Even rented drums from Guitar Center when I visited once and put ‘em in the kitchen so I could practice and play whatever he asked for while he was eating lol. His advice, generosity and long phone calls got me and a lot of people through rough times. We got through my Grandmother’s passing in 2016 together, but this is by far the roughest week of my life and for the first time, he’s not here. Haven’t yet accepted the person closest to me is gone, but where I am with music and in life is what he wanted for me, so I’ll do my best starting there. Forgive me if I’m not “on” with much else for a while.
Our birthday next month will be hard as hell. Gonna spend some quality time with Mom and the close few who’ve gotten me through the last week.
Turned off comments, Pop wasn’t big on social media. In lieu of those, CALL your people today. No texts. Visit if you can. There’s always tomorrow…till there ain’t. Love you immensely, Pop aka “Bucky”. With all you’ve done and sacrificed, you can rest now. I’ll keep doing my best to make you proud.